Tiger Mom

Yes it is true! I read the book...and I liked it! Now I am not saying in the slightest bit that I will EVER be a Tiger Mom. For one my Chinese Zodiac is a dog. I admit the dog summarizes me quite well, and I am much different than a Tiger! I also was raised by a "Western Mom", a hippie mom as she calls herself. But when Kevin brought the book home last week and asked me to read it with him I agreed. I figured it would be good for me to learn ways to better discipline, teach, and pretty much crack down on Ayda. I was a little put off by it when I read the first couple chapters. Who is this lady? Did she want her kids to completely hate her?? But I kept on and soon realized she had many good points. I will say she makes Western parents seem lazy and uncaring about their children's education and future, which is not entirely true. However, I can see her points about western parents being more carefree and allowing their kids make their own choices. Live and learn mentality.

I actually learned a lot reading this book. Yes I have better ideas on how to teach Ayda (no we will not be studying for hours upon hours...at least not while she is 2!). I also gained a much better understanding of the Chinese culture which is still very true in Kevin's family. The mentality of his grandparents, parents, siblings, and himself. Education is very important. And we plan to teach Ayda daily so that she is learning all the time. Not let her just sit in front of a television or computer to learn either. I will be sitting down with her and working on different things appropriate for her age and also skills that are more advanced.

It is funny to me that this book has gotten such a negative feedback from so many. I can only guess it is because the author is so blunt about our culture verses her culture. But having grown up in the American culture and now being married to someone who was raised in the Chinese culture, I see both sides of the story. Perhaps I am more open minded. I admire Kevin's parents for pushing him the way they did with his education. He teaches me things all the time. Now don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change my childhood for anything. I played sports which I think does teach discipline and socialization. I wasn't a straight A student but I graduated high school with honors, went to the college of my choice, graduated nursing school .2 points from honors (that was annoying!), and worked at one of the best Children's Hospitals in the country. Do I wish I had a master's degree in something. Yes. But am I in a place in my life right now that I feel that is obtainable, not really. With (almost) two small children that degree might wait a couple more years. Kevin on the other hand received his Doctorate at the age of 26. I think that is quite impressive.

It is just fascinating to look at both cultures and see the good and the bad. I cannot see myself being as crazy strict and disciplined with Ayda as this lady was with her daughters. But I see that I really need to step up my game a lot and make some changes. It's scary because I doubt my abilities to teach her daily. When she flat out refuses to tell me which reading card say "dog" I sit there at a loss.Knowing she knows the word but is just refusing to tell me. So we sit there and stare at each other. Finally I ask again and she usually points to the word that says dog. Whew! But I still doubt. The book was good for me though. If you know me well, you know I am the slowest reader out there. I read this book in four days though (229 pages) and gained so much insight from it! I think it is getting way more negative publicity than it deserves. Just my opinion. So from here Kevin and I plan to find the balance. Balance "the American way" with the "Chinese way". Honestly I am ok if we swing more to the Chinese way. I admire it, respect it, and want that for her.